I'm not going to lie, Crispin Glover is the main reason I was excited for Simon Says. And why wouldn't I be? He's made a career out of playing eccentric nut bars and his work here is definitely no exception. In fact, if it wasn't for the fact Glover goes so ape shit over-the-top and that a lot of the death scenes are pretty damn cool, this wouldn't have been quite as enjoyable due to writer-director Bill Dear's haphazard script. At its heart this is a total slasher movie with a side of multiple personality disorder thrown in for good measure but Dear just seems to want to give Glover's character too much pathos when I'd of been perfectly happy with him just cavorting around the woods being loony tunes.

The set-up here is yawn worthy as a group of college kids are heading out for a weekend of panning for gold and getting a little bit messed up in the process. It's your typical batch of clichéd characters though, for some reason, I found them a little bit easier to take than in most flicks of this type. Maybe it's because the cast seems to be having some fun with the material (with Greg Cipes particularly engaging as the "no worries" stoner of the group, Zack) though only Margo Harshman as the film's heroine, Kate, manages to generally keep up with Glover once he goes full-bore psychotic.

Our group decides to stop at a run-down local store and meet the twins Simon and Stanley (Glover), one of which is slow-minded and the other just plain sleazy and creepy. Right from the get go we're made aware our bumpkin store keeps are the villains of this piece as they proceed to not make our wannabe miners very welcome. It also gives Dear an opportunity to pepper his script with various violent flashbacks and visions as he tries to paint a back-story for his baddies where Simon is abused by his twin and went on to do a very bad thing to his parents.

The rest of the movie tends to stumble about without much focus as Dear introduces random campers and paintball players into the mix to bump up the body count as the cast is stalked and killed by Simon who's taken to donning forest-like camouflage, has a thing for pickaxes (even making a hand-cranked catapult like device using them, which is cool in theory but pretty dumb in execution), and even takes the time to mercilessly stomp a poodle under foot giving the audience a "oh gross!" laugh in the process.

Possibly the most surprising thing about the movie comes from the person behind it. Known more for family friendly fare like Harry and the Hendersons, Angels in the Outfield, and the "Richard Greico does his best James Bond impression" flick If Looks Could Kill, Dear shows an unforeseen mean streak and slings a decent amount of gore in the process - I had fun with many of the kills including the scene where a hitchhiker is impaled by a pickaxe attached to a swinging rope and the inventive use for a burnt-up body during the finale.

Simon Says is definitely a movie with flaws. It doesn't start off that well, things tend to happen quickly and without reason more often than they should, and it begins to feel like not much more than a parade of dead bodies in the final third; but I still somehow managed to get enough enjoyment out of it to be entertained. I'm going to have to give most of that credit to Glover whose manic performance and bravura instilled a lot more personality into the movie than most of its ilk. (Chris Hartley, 6/15/09)

Directed By: Bill Dear.
Written By: Bill Dear.

Starring: Crispin Glover, Margo Harshman, Greg Cipes, Kelly Vitz.

Picture Ratio: 1.85:1 Widescreen.

Picture Quality: At times the transfer shows some mild grain but for the majority of the film it's clean of debris and has solid colour definition. This doesn't look bad at all.

Extras: The review copy we received contained no special features but the retail disc will contain a director's commentary, storyboard-to-film comparisions, and a still gallery.