Before I go ahead and dash your hopes that Rocktober Blood is one of the greatest heavy metal slasher movies ever made I'd like you to revel in the glory that is not only the amazing title but also the kick-ass poster artwork. Take it all in, swish it around in your brain like a fine wine, and promptly realize it's the best thing about this flick from the filmmaking team of Ferd and Beverly Sebastian (Gator Bait). Having picked up the VHS box countless times as a kid, but never actually renting it, I finally popped this in late one evening - and promptly struggled to stay awake. Thankfully, the lumbering script that makes little to no sense, amazingly dated (but still epic) tunes on the soundtrack by the "Oh so metal..." named band Sorcery, and some scattered moments of entertainment balances the outright boredom and kept me going right up to the glorious last fifteen minutes.

You know, when a flick like Rocktober Blood storms out of the gates with an amazingly entertaining first ten minutes it's really a bummer when things start to go downhill from there. Our credits sequence is set in a recording studio (obviously a "metal" one as there's a bottle of Jack Daniels prominently displayed on the mixing board) where A-hole rock star Billy (Tray Loren) is belting out a catchy, high-trilled ditty called "I'm Back". After mistreating girlfriend Lynn (Donna Scoggins), Billy soon goes on a quick, unexplained, killing rampage giving us an opening that contains that sweet, sweet song, a throat slit, the first (of many) exposed boobs, and a person being pinned to a wall. Yeah, this brings the sleaze early and often! This prologue ends on an abrupt note when Billy utters "C'mere you f*cker, I'll kill your ass!" before chasing after a security guard.

Flash forward to two years later and we learn that not only did Lynn survive but that night Billy went on a killing spree murdering twenty-five people before being captured and executed a year later. Lynn's trying to bounce back from the trauma by teaming up with manager Chris (Nigel Benjamin) to arrange the title rock show but upon seeing a seemingly undead Billy pop-up she's convinced to go spend some time away at a lakeside cottage.

Cue a quick scene of 80s styled aerobics, Lynn being harassed by a constantly laughing Billy while his albums play backwards on the soundtrack (he also sports face make-up resembling Alice Cooper and David Bowie at times), a few dull kills, and a grave digging scene with a silly pay-off. This leads us to the aforementioned finale, set during the big rock show promised ages ago before the movie proceeds to have a decided lack of everything heavy metal, that tosses out a sort of "greatest hits" of Billy's tunes and expected attempt at a twist while throwing in a mic stand with a knife on the end that gives us a few moments of crazy gore before the ridiculous finish.

Unsurprisingly nobody here went on to any sort of acting career. As our put upon heroine Scoggins does doff the duds, wears a crazy wig and lip syncs, and acts like she's going crazy but her line delivery and generally useless presence doesn't help. Benjamin sort of drifts through the flick as the mostly disaffected Chris but gets props for supplying the actual singing voice on all the Sorcery greatness. The Sebastian's also give their son Ben a minor role as a security guard and he is credited for effects work. If anyone comes out of this with my approval it's Loren. He's just so damn over-the-top as our golden throated killer and you can't help but chuckle at his constant maniacal laughs and delivery of many creative threats - he'd appear in two other Sebastian efforts (Gator Bait II, American Angels: Baptism of Blood) and nothing else, which is kind of too bad.

Thirty years down the road and Rocktober Blood is one dated, not very good time capsule. It's low-budget and pretty lowbrow but I found parts of it strangely watchable. Unfortunately I had to slog through a lot of dull bullshit in between the great opening and closing moments which makes it really hard to recommend unless you're an 80s slasher completist. It's one of the lesser horror flicks to use heavy metal as its backdrop - if you really want to see something decent from this sub-genre you'd be much better served by the speaker sucking goodness of Black Roses or the fun metalhead romp that is Trick or Treat. (Chris Hartley, 8/27/14)

Directed By: Beverly Sebastian.
Written By: Ferd Sebastian, Beverly Sebastian.

Starring: Tray Loren, Donna Scoggins, Cana Cockrell, Rene Hubbard.