About as unnecessary as most DTV sequels coming out in recent years, I'll Always Know What You Did Last Summer is another "just there" release from Sony - meaning that the company decided to cash-in on another familiar franchise name in hopes of making a few extra bucks off those who remember the first two movies (c'mon, it's been eight years since the second one even, the "teen slasher" trend ran out of gas years ago).

Taking its inspiration from Lois Duncan's novel and the first two entries, Michael Weiss' script for the third movie doesn't really offer-up much new (and the only real wrinkle it adds in the finale may be a nice attempt to spin the "fisherman" off in a new direction, but it doesn't quite work and had me scratching my head) and that's probably why I spent most of the movie looking at the clock - this is one bland and dull movie.

It's the fourth of July in Broken Ridge, Colorado and a bunch of recently graduated high schoolers are having fun at the local carnival. After scaring each other with stories of the supposed urban legend of "The Fisherman" (which we know, having seen the first two movies, is real); the hook-handed, rain-slicker sporting killer shows-up to wreak havoc. Or at least until we find-out that it was a prank staged by a few of them that ends-up backfiring and causing one of their friends to end-up accidentally dead (I guess when riding your skateboard off a roof you really shouldn't ollie into tractor spikes).

Deciding that rather than facing any sort of punishment for their actions, our group swears to keep everything a secret ("the secret dies with us"). We flash forward to a year later and everyone's gone their separate ways. However, they'll soon end-up back together and running for their lives when Amber (Brooke Nevin) starts getting ominous text messages of the "I know what you did last summer" variety.

Amber turns to her estranged best friend Zoe (Torrey DeVitto, who looks good and does the best acting job here) to try and warn the others - including her ex-boyfriend, Colby (David Paetkau, who's poor as the script's "jerk" character) who she recently split with. At first they're not sure how seriously to take it, but a few more messages (and the death of the most guilt-ridden of the gang) causes them to get freaked-out. Who's going to be the next victim for... dramatic pause... the fisherman?

Looking lower-budgeted than most of Sony's DTV sequels, I'll Always Know What You Did Last Summer takes way too damn long to get rolling. Weiss and director Slyvain White (who relies way too much on the usual quick cuts and flash effects too many modern horror movies use for "scares") decide instead to build things us like a suspense thriller tossing out a few red herring characters and "almost" kills (the attack on the suspended gondola is completely unconvincing) which just annoyed me when I realized the movie was halfway in and nobody's been killed yet!

However, I will admit that once the deaths start they pile up pretty quickly as most people fall victim to some sort of hook slashing (the standard throat slash being the method most preferred) and while most of the kills are pretty ho-hum there is a decent one involving a windowed door. In fact, I'm willing to say this was bloodier than I expected.

But up until a finale that offers a few moments of mild excitement, this was just one boring ride. It's too light on the deaths at first and the script is a complete retread while White seems to be trying way too hard to make it all "unique" when all the tricks he's trying are already half-baked. That's not to say this one sucked, it's just one of those movies that fails to make any sort of impression on you whatsoever. (Chris Hartley, 12/15/06)

Directed By: Slyvain White.
Written By: Michael Weiss.

Starring: Brooke Nevin, David Paetkau, Torrey DeVitto, Ben Easter.