Joe Sarno made a name for himself in the late 60's and 70's by directing a number of sexploitation flicks such as Inga, Butterflies, and Vampire Ecstasy. These movies gave Marie Liljedahl and Marie Forsa a place in sex goddess history and established Sarno as one of a number of directors who had a knack for delivering erotic softcore with a bit of an artistic flair. There were more to his movies than just sex as Sarno took pride in the look of this films and tried to make the stories a little more interesting than the usual product that the raincoat crowd was used to. As the 70's drew to a close, Sarno found himself making the move to hardcore and worked with some of the biggest names in the business such as Amber Lynn and Little Oral Annie before retiring from filmmaking in the mid 80's. As Seduction Cinema has been re-releasing a number of Sarno's classic erotic titles, it seems only fitting that they would be responsible for bringing him out of retirement to write and direct Suburban Secrets a few years after his 80th birthday.

The plot is like something you would find in a low budget version of "Desperate Housewives" as the residents of a small town are all sleeping with each other and creating drama. In fact, this is one of those movies where nearly everyone sleeps with everyone and I guess that was necessary to pad the two and a half hour (!) running time. Isadora Edison stars as Laura, a nude model who returns to her hometown after she learns that her ex-boyfriend Nelson is moving in with her aunt Cynthia. Laura's return brings up all sorts of feelings as she has to leave her lovesick lesbian photographer behind in New York, has an effect on bringing her sister Winnifred out of her shell, and manages to sleep with Nelson, his sister, and aunt Cynthia during her stay. Yes, you read that right. Incest abounds as Laura sleeps with her aunt and Nelson sleeps with his sister. I found these to be odd choices that you don't see often but Sarno is no stranger to this taboo subject as he has explored it a few times in some of his past movies as well. The movie also marks a bit of a departure from the usual lesbian scenes that Seduction has built an empire on as there are a few trysts involving Nelson and one of the ladies.

When I heard about how long this was, I thought that this would be a chore to get through but it was not as bad as I was expecting thanks to the fact that the story managed to be straightforward and it thrived in its melodrama. This was slowed down considerably due to the numerous overlong sex scenes that sometimes literally let a single shot go for multiple minutes without a camera move or cut in sight. Although sometimes the offbeat framing and placement of the actors was unique, even those shots could get a little old when held too long. Another problem was the acting which was pretty terrible for the most part with Chelsea Mundae (Misty's sister) and Kay Kirtland being particularly bad in the roles of Laura and Nelson's sisters respectively. Nelson himself was played by John Samuel Jordan who played Nelson with an uncomfortable manner that you were expecting him to pull out an Uzi and go postal at any given moment. Edison and porn star Tina Tyler, however, were actually pretty good in their roles and seemed to have a little more experience than the others in front of the camera. In fact, Tyler and her enthusiasm was the high point of the movie and fans of the term "MILF" would certainly find a prime example with her.

Although it is good to see Sarno make a new movie, this is hardly going to be one of the ones he is remembered for. The type of movie that Sarno used to make is now a thing of the past and I don't think it will ever be duplicated. While I thought the fact that he made a new flick was a novel idea, I think that low budget, Sarno's age, and general mediocre quality of the end result was a little disappointing. Not that it would have made a whole lot of difference but I would have been curious to see how this would have turned out if original choices Misty Mundae and Julian Wells had been cast and if Seduction Cinema had maybe doubled the budget so that there were a few more locations and a little more going on. (Josh Pasnak, 3/25/07)

Directed By: Joseph W. Sarno.
Written By: Joseph W. Sarno.

Starring: Isadora Edison, Tina Tyler, John Samuel Jordan, Kay Kirtland.

Picture Ratio: 1.78:1 Widescreen.

Picture Quality: The movie looks clear and the all-important skin tones are well defined.

Extras: This "Director's Edition" DVD is a two-disc set. The first disc contains the director's cut of the film (which I based my review on) and a 10-minute featurette entitled "Inside Suburban Secrets". This covers how Seduction Cinema got involved with Sarno and also goes over the casting of the film and the usual back patting.

The second disc features a "Hot TV Cut" of the film. Honestly, I have to say I didn't sit through this again. I did, however, watch it on fast forward and I saw that all of the major plot points are there and the sex scenes are scaled down considerably although there is still plenty of T&A. I almost wish that this was the version that was released as it would have probably tightened up the pace quite a bit and tamed some of the excessively long shots from the director's cut. There are a few extras on the second disc as well. The first is a 12-minute featurette on a Sarno panel that took place at the Lake Placid Film Festival. This was interesting as a number of critics are interviewed and they explain how Joe's films and sexploitation movies in general are more than just skin flicks but actually have artistic merit. While I agree with them to a certain extent, I think sometimes this justification of the genre can go a little overboard. Next is a 13-minute behind the scenes featurette that shows the set as being quite fun and laid back and that the principal cast members enjoy working with Joe and like his style. Finally, there are a number of trailers for Retro-Seduction Cinema titles including a number of Sarno's films.

Visit Seduction Cinema for more info.