I've never really understood the recent appeal of taking classic works of literature and twisting them into something macabre. When something like "Sense and Sensibility and Zombies" appeared on the shelves at my local bookstore, I gave an indifferent shrug. This was pretty much my reaction to the big studio adaptation of Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter based on the novel by Seth Grahame-Smith. It's blending of history and popcorn flick histrionics is passable at best and, even though I hate this thought, I suspect that even The Asylum's rip-off of this, Abraham Lincoln vs. Zombies, is probably more entertaining - if, perhaps, for different reasons.

As a youngster Abraham Lincoln (Benjamin Walker) witnessed his mother killed by the bloodsucking Jack Barts (Marton Csokas). After a failed attempt to get revenge, he's taken under the wing of vampire hunter Henry Sturgis (Dominic Cooper) who teaches him how to eliminate them. Soon, Lincoln is carving his way through the undead, including getting his vengeance, which gains him the notice of the evil Adam (Rufus Sewell). From here, the story follows Lincoln's path to becoming the sixteenth President of the United States and having to head-up a war against the vampire horde but along the way we're introduced to other significant historical figures who he befriends as well as having to suffer through many dull scenes involving love interest Mary Todd (Mary Elizabeth Winstead) as director Timur Bekmambetov throws in too many of the stylized, CG heavy, action sequences he's known for from his earlier efforts Night Watch and Wanted.

Throughout this flick's 105 minute running time I mostly felt lethargic which is surprising since you're constantly being slapped in the face with obvious moments catering to the film's 3D, overdone scenes of people being thrown through walls, a lame horse stampede moment that ends with one of the creatures being fired like out of a slingshot, and a "hurry up and be over already!" finale where Lincoln and Adam are duking it out in a train balanced on a precarious, and burning, bridge. That's the problem. This is essentially a silly, stupid as Hell action flick that just happens to contain Abraham Lincoln as well as vampires. It could just have easily been a mindless, generic effort with equally generic characters but instead cashes in on a head-scratching fad. It doesn't deliver anything for horror fans and it's pretty boring for action fans as well. I also have to wonder why the makers didn't even attempt to bring any mirth to the ridiculous premise and everything's pretty dry and humourless.

In the lead, Walker just isn't convincing. He just comes across as much too wimpy to be not only a fearless vampire slayer but also one of the most respected President's in history. Watching him almost had me wish that Daniel Day-Lewis would show up, shove him out of the way, and start decapitating vamps. I also found Sewell (Dark City) to be flat as our main baddie and Winstead to be generally pointless despite looking decent in a corset. Anthony Mackie fares okay as Abraham's best pal, Will Johnson, and it's always cool to see Jimmi Simpson - who constantly steals scenes in "It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia" as one of the McPoyle brothers.

Adapted by author Grahame-Smith for the big screen, Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter is just there. Judging from what's on display, I have no real desire to read the book (that has, incidentally, been sitting on my bookshelf for a few years) or his follow-up, the Three Wise Men themed "Unholy Night". Of course, he may have had to add more action to satisfy the studio but I just don't dig Bekmambetov's agenda of visuals over substance and just can't see this appealing to anyone but the same people who made the Transformers films huge hits. (Chris Hartley, 5/1/13)

Directed By: Timur Bekmambetov.
Written By: Seth Grahame-Smith.

Starring: Benjamin Walker, Dominic Cooper, Anthony Mackie, Mary Elizabeth Winstead.